Thursday, April 27, 2006

Never say "Never" or "Always," Always


Ok so I should have known by now not to say “never” or “always” under any circumstances because chances are you will, you have, or you did at least once in your life in which case “never” and “always” will not apply.

Then why have “never” and “always” in our vocabulary? DRAMATIC Effect. Yes, I’ve decided that the reason words like these exist in the English language it’s because we need words that carry weight and convey our anxieties and help us make a point.

I know that at least I use “never” and “always” when I loose my cool, which seems to happen often lately. I’ve told my self I will never do this or that and yet here I am. Here I stand after so many dos that should have been don’ts yes, I am a mess.

So now I have choices to make to make it right. I need to get over what I feel and how messed up things are and get up and start doing something about it. Why am I writing this? Well, I kinda want to remind myself later of what was going through my head at the moment. I’m about to reach difficult decision and I want to be clearheaded when I make it.

I really don’t want this moment to pass me by and then there I will be a few months from now with my dos that should have been don’ts wondering why the hell I was so stupid!

Friday, April 21, 2006

Are You Happy Now?


A sigh, a laugh, a tear, many of which I’ve had throughout the years. I think of you sometimes and I sigh, and I laugh, and I cry. I can see you in my mind, and hear you in my heart, touch you with my voice. You are still part of me, somehow.
-Dariela


“Hello love. Yes it’s me…(again).
It was nice seeing you yesterday, well your picture..uh yes I know. At least the reporters got it right. I know, no receding hairline on that picture. Of course you look great bald! Very nice..(you always looked great to me anyhow) you need a beanie at night though. Is it cold over there now? I imagined it would be,” she twisted her hair around her index finger, perfect long curl.

She did that sometimes when she was nervous. He could hear it in her voice. He could feel her through her voice, just picture her there, that same soft hair brushing against his cheek, soft hair spilling over the sides of his pillow.

Sigh*heart pounding

“So when is your signing going to be? You touring the states this time?
No, I might not make it to that one. Sorry. I have this conference..you know just some new launch for the company, usually software products…blah blah. We break ground next week on the new building. Don’t worry there is not much excitement just more work for me. I know, it’s my fault, business as usual thank God. Well, at least I can workout the stress and put food on the table with my fat checks. How is…everything ( and by that I mean you and her)?"

They kept on chatting but not really saying anything of consequence. “How have you been? Do you think of me too? Are you happy now?” these where the questions on both of their minds and yet they will not ask.
__________________________

“Are you going to start this again?”

“Well, I wouldn’t have to start if you would just tell me. What do you see in him that I don’t have?
Is he any smarter? Does he even have a degree? Is it the money? Is he more creative? Is it the way he touches you? I can learn to do that. I would love to do that, I’d do anything for just a few more moments.”

“A…look, please don’t. Everything is different now. I’m different, we, well…(her voice seem to be lost for decades before arriving to the end of that sentence)..we are not We anymore. I’ve fallen in love, harder than I thought I would. I don’t have to tell you how great he is, he just Is. You are great and we were great but you know better than to expect for Us to work. We just didn’t, we couldn’t.”


“I know what he has that I don’t. You.”

___________________________________

“So are you going to have time for at least one drink? One drink I promise and then you can go work.” He paused to hear her response.

“I think it can be arranged”, she said in a playful voice. They both knew it was no joke. They couldn’t have cared less about groundbreakings and book signings. They were going to meet again and there would be questions. Expectations.

“Did you think of me while you were gone? I need to know before I see you.”

There it was. The leap. Just ask.

“You kept coming back to me. Part of me wanted to swivel around in my chair to check if you really were lying on the futon like you were years ago.
Do you still think it is a good idea to see each other?”

“And who are we to tell what is good…I think it’s good for us. I know where it’s going to go, but not where it’s going to end up.”

“I still recall that day you know, I hadn’t heard from you in a couple of weeks. Work, you explained. Busy at work. In your hand twirled keys to a truck that wasn’t mine, or yours, yet. You explained to my mother that you’d borrowed the keys from a friend, your boss at work, but from the way you glanced over at me, I knew he was becoming more than a friend just as I was becoming more of a memory.”

“I’m sorry. I know. But that is in the past now.”

Her finger was no longer entertained by her hair. Her heart was still racing. Now her foot kept the beat of her heart and her anxiety grew stronger. How could she put it together now? There was so much to be said, so much to explain, so much to look back at. She wished she could hold him like she did before, save him the way she should have so many years before. Yet she said nothing.

“I know, sometimes I still remember. I am not mad anymore. It still hurts sometimes, but more than anything because I wished I could have done more to change your mind. I wish I could have made you believe in us. You where so young and I should have known better. Maybe if could have looked for you, instead of always waiting for you to come to me. Maybe…forget it. It’s no use. I just want to see you”, he thought. He said nothing of that.

“In our own little world? Let’s see eachother in the real world. Tell me about her. I’ll tell you of how my plans are going. I’ve been through a rough patch but we have so many projects now, him and I.”

“Great, it’ll be great. Really. I can show you some plans for houses that I’ve liked. I am not sure if we’ll stay in the East coast.”

“Ok. Just tell me where and when and I’ll be there. Promise. At any rate, what is your book about this time? I haven’t had a chance to read it. It’s only been a few months and it’s already a best seller.”

“It’s the ultimate story of two people so perfect for each other, but separated by love and death. Separated but inseparable. Just like we were and still are.”

Silence on the line. She smiled.

“Life has a way of doing these things. I know what you mean. I’ll read your novel, then we’ll talk about it over those drinks.”

“Are you happy now?” they both asked at the same time.

They laughed at how eager they were to ask that question. Yes. They replied.

“Ok, silly go to bed and call me in the morning. We can talk about this later.”

“Sweetheart, you think we did good? I’m glad now that you did, I mean that you are happy. I’m glad I found her.”

“I’m happy for you too. I’m happy for us both after all, we are separated by love, separated but inseparable.”

It's a Gale Thing Too





I think I did mentioned that I was also watching Queer as Folk. You can say it's because it's full of hot guys that make out so it's good to watch because you don't have to block the girl out. Well, actually Queer as Folk is ALL drama. Totally validated lover quarrels, human rights activists, family crisis, parenthood, friendships, and anything else you might enjoy in your favorite novela, except these are all men (which makes it even more interesting).
So here is the deal, this man Brian, is basically the Shane (read previous post for information) of the show. He is the hot guy of the group that gets all the guys and is pretty much a cynic but has a warm heart afterall. Here are only some of Gale Harold's pics. Click here to learn more about the actor.

No Sleep...

So it's about 2:30Am on a Friday morning and I am not sure what I am doing up. Really, I should be sleeping but sleep is something I don't think I can get at the time. I am currently listening to Shakira. Yep, I remember when she only used to be a singer from Colombia, that I used to listen to in the 90's. Now it's like, "Oh you like Shakira too?," and I am like "hell yeah I used to like her since she was only 18 and had black strait hair." All of the sudden they make it big in the U.S. and everyone assumes they are new in the business. Who else has gone through this?

Glad you asked.

Ricky Martin for example.
Shirtless, Ricky in the 90s he used to come out in a Mexican soap opera like that. Black Shirt, Ricky late 90s early 2001-2001. White Shirt, Ricky now. He toned up, got a hair cut, this hunkasourus couldn't have looked better.....

Now to get some sleep. Need to work tomorrow.

Monday, April 17, 2006

He Loves You, He Loves You NOT

This is too good to pass.....

Claim: A woman discovers on a call-in radio show that her boyfriend is married.
Both those scenarios are precisely what happened to two Minnesota residents named Kim and Greg on Andy Savage's radio program (aired on KEGE 93.7 in Minneapolis) one day.

The 25-year-old Kim phoned in to take part in a scheme called "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not," in which callers who suspected their lovers of fooling around behind their backs gave Savage contact information, and he employed various ruses to try to catch out the straying sweethearts. Kim had been going out with a man named Greg for about a year, she said. Since Greg lived in Duluth, which was quite a distance away (over 150 miles) from Kim's home near Minneapolis, they saw each other only on weekends. Alarm bells should have been going off already, but Kim swore she had "absolutely no reason" to suspect Greg had been messing around on her. "I know he loves me," she told Savage quite confidently. ("Then this is going to be boring," Savage quipped in reply.)

Nonetheless, Savage plunged ahead with the scheme. He called Greg in Duluth and told him that his business card had been picked out of a fishbowl at a local business establishment, entitling him to one dozen free roses. (Greg didn't find this unusual, since he admitted he came out to Minneapolis every weekend "on business.") And where would Greg like the flowers sent? "To my wife, Cindy," he replied.

"What?" inquired the heartbroken Kim. "Cindy? To your wife, Cindy? Your wife, Cindy?"

Greg, taken aback, could only respond "Aw, Jesus . . ." before Savage provided him with the now superfluous bit of information that Greg's girlfriend was on the line. Greg fumbled for a bit as Kim questioned him about his wife, then finally tried the old "I was only kidding" dodge.

It didn't work. A teary-eyed Kim called him a "dick" and hung up, and Greg did the same after informing Savage he was a "son of a bitch."

Yes, this was the real thing and not a staged stunt, according to Andy, now on the air with KNDD 107.7 in Seattle. It was an uncomfortable performance, both for the participants and for the listeners. If you can overcome your squeamishness, hear it for yourself through the link below. (Requires RealPlayer plug-in.)

Additional information:
"He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not"
(Andy Savage — KEGE 93.7-FM, Minneapolis)

To hear the actual clip go to: http://www.snopes.com/love/betrayal/radio.htm

Saturday, April 15, 2006

It's a Kate Thing





So there are other things I've been doing the last few months. I guess I can tell you little by little. I've been watching all these shows and I get all into the characters...that's just me. For example, my favorite movie is Bram Stoker's Dracula and I can watch it over and over without getting tired of it. I tend to get into the stories that I like and really connect with some characters to some extend. I've been watching Sex and The City, Friends, Will and Grace, The Closer, Law and Order, Conviction, Queer as Folk, and The L Word.
Right now Shane (played by Katherine Meonnig) has my attention. I like that she is the most unattainable, liberated, and the playgirl of the characters, yet she is the one that was most emotional when Dana died. I find her reactions facinating. There are ways that Shane acts and thinks that makes me go....hmmm I wish I could be like that.
Apparently I am not the only one that likes her. There are sites of Katherine Moennig everywhere. Interesting enough, she happens to be Gwyneth Paltrow's cousin.

http://www.thelwordonline.com/shane.shtml

http://www.kate-moennig.net/

http://katherine-moennig.org/

http://www.thelword-fr.net/katherinemoennig/uk/galerie.php

So there you have it. A bunch of sites on the gal. I have some pictures of her I can post.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

This One is for All My Peeps!!

So how's it going? Me? Busy as hell as you might already see. What can I say March was very eventful to say the least. The end of February was even worse.


So I have watched more movies and downloaded even more music. I kinda discovered Trip-Hop and I am absolutely obsessed with it.

Here are some artist and bands I liked:

Anja Garbarek ===>

"Anja Garbarek (b. July 24, 1970) is a Norwegian singer-songwriter. She is the daughter of the Norwegian jazz saxophonist Jan Garbarek and grew up around Oslo. She received the Spellemannsprisen in 2001 for her album Smiling & Waving in the open class category. She is married to John Mallison, with whom she has had one daughter."
http://www.anjagarbarek.com/

<=== Anjali Bhatia

"An incredibly sensual take on lounge exotica, The World of Lady A is the second album from enigmatic diva, Anjali. The very adventurous release picks up where her highly acclaimed debut album left off and is a multi-layered cocktail of influences that transcend cultures and is arguably one of the most original albums of the year. A singer, songwriter, DJ, thinker and super-babe, Anjali invites e-mag into the musical world she has created for herself... "

http://www.anjali.org.uk/

Big Muff/ Itaal Shur ==>

"Itaal Shur's drive to produce music that transcends cultural boundaries has earned him the ultimate recognition from his peers-a Latin Grammy nomination for Song of The Year, an award he was honored with at the 1999 Grammy Awards for co-writing Carlos Santana's "Smooth" with Rob Thomas."
http://www.itaalshur.com/


<== Esthero "Esthero (real name Jen-Bea Englishman, born December 23, 1978) is a Canadian singer-songwriter who lives and works in the city of Toronto, Ontario. The name "Esthero," pronounced es-THERE-oh, refers both to the singer and to the two-person team of herself and her producer, Doc. She claims to have gotten the name from an old film character named Esther, whose last line in a movie (called, The Bell Jar based on the autobiographical Sylvia Plath novel) is, "If I am to be the hero, then I cannot fly from darkness."

http://tln.lib.mi.us/~amutch/esthero/


Etro Anime ==>

"Coming from New York they played clubs such as Izzy Bar and Spiral Lounge, but it was not until 2004 that we are seeing a full length artist album. This interesting band is composed of Tom Welch, Shambo Pfaff, David Fisher, Tom Birkley, and Cuban-born vocalist Lissett Alea. Their music is true fusion of drum & bass, house, and trip-hop with sexy flowing vocals. They crank up the first track "Purest One," with a drum & bass flavor, melding it with some dark loops and beautiful work on the keys. It is a very exciting start to an interesting showcase. They bring out a bit more of the trip-hop sound on the song "Portrait." It is totally reminiscent of a Tricky song, but not as hardcore. The band's first release "Summer Rain" entered The National Dance chart at number 29 and with good reason. They came at this track with a funky house vibe and it makes me think of summer beach parties that never stop. It is quite a beautiful song. Etro Anime is not even afraid of a little hip-hop either. On "Diablo" they put in a harder bass line with some scratching and elegant vocals laid over top. It's what you might get if you mixed Mark Farina with Jazzy Jay and added a splash of Nelly Furtado. Drum & bass re-enters the equation on the song "Adonis." The lighter rhythms come together nicely with Alea's soothing vocals. This album is all about breaking down boundaries that stand in dance music and fusing the styles together, harmoniously."
http://www.alwaysontherun.net/etroanime.htm

<== Flunk

"The thing about Flunk is quite simple. It is all about the love of music - and the lack of words. Or being tired of words. Organised by Ulph, Flunk are the collective enterprise of the former, guitarist Jo Bakke (he used to be in Norwegian pop act Happy Campers, who moved on to electronic music and even had a 12" on Ninja Tunes, and now also is one half of house-combo Antenna who released their first 12" on US label Guidance this autumn), and Anja Øyen Vister (a medical student who has been singing for years, but only occasinally in a band setting). There are also others adding layers during the process of making Flunk music, including Ivar Winther and his flute, and Ulphs girlfriend, Tine Skarland singing.Ulph has made four albums with Norwegian pop act Folk & Røvere since 1996, receiving both critical acclaim and some brief moments of chart success for the slightly odd mix of Norwegian lyrics and downbeat music. The first two albums were made with Beate Lech, now enjoying success on her own with Beady Belle.Flunk, then, is basically about letting the music speak louder than the ever flowing words. The soundscapes are mid-tempo, and with the sound of guitars almost always present, it puts a kind of rock touch to the chill-out feel and pop tunes. Well, that is the general idea, anyway."

http://www.beatservice.no/flunk.asp

Lunascape ==>

"At the core of Lunascape are musicians Kyoko Baertsoen and Walter Hilhorst. The duo originally met in 1993 at the television and film academy in Brussels, Belgium and began to fiddle around with covers and some original material. In 1997, Kyoko was offered the spot of lead singer for Hooverphonic and her work with Walter was put on the back burner. After touring Europe extensively with Hooverphonic, Kyoko left the band and returned to her work with Walter; Lunascape was born. The Lunascape sound mixes catchy rhythms, sampling and loops with electric guitars reinforced by strong melodies and Kyoko's enchanting voice. Kyoko recently spoke about her musical influences: “I’ve listened to so many different types of music from Abba to Pink Floyd. At about 13 I was immersed in the sinister new wave of Sisters of Mercy, Bauhaus and Joy Division but one band really took me all the way into the ‘beautiful realms of music’: The Cocteau Twins. It’s the extraordinary original melodies of Liz Fraser; I've never heard anyone do this again. For me she'll stay the goddess of chant forever.”Taken by their blend of etherealism and emotional adeptness, a European A&R rep caught the duo at one of their many shows throughout the region and quickly signed them and shuttled them into a studio to begin recording. While the band released albums and singles in Europe, their first North American exposure came in a most unusual way. In 2001, Kyoko starred alongside Harry Shearer in IMAX’s 3-D film “Haunted Castle.” Kyoko became an underground cult figure. Fans uncovered Lunascape’s European catalog and import versions began to sell in the US. Another twist in Lunascape’s international fortunes came in 2003. Sinead O’Connor teamed up with Delerium’s Rhys Fulber for his new project, Conjure One. The first single was a cover of Lunascape’s “Tears From The Moon.” Kyoko and Walter had worked on the song with famed producer Rick Nowels (Madonna, Dido) in his LA studio. Sinead and Rhys’ version went to number 3 on Billboard’s dance charts and hovered in the Top 5 for several weeks becoming a hallmark of dance clubs throughout the world in the Summer of 2003. "
http://www.lunascape.net/

<== Potishead

"Portishead may not have invented trip-hop, but they were among the first to popularize it, particularly in America. Taking their cue from the slow, elastic beats that dominated Massive Attack's Blue Lines and adding elements of cool jazz, acid house, and soundtrack music, Portishead created an atmospheric, alluringly dark sound. The group wasn't as avant-garde as Tricky, nor as tied to dance traditions as Massive Attack; instead, it wrote evocative pseudo-cabaret pop songs that subverted their conventional structures with experimental productions and rhythms of trip-hop. As a result, Portishead appealed to a broad audience — not just electronic dance and alternative rock fans, but thirtysomethings who found techno, trip-hop, and dance as exotic as worldbeat. Before Portishead released their debut album, Dummy, in 1994, trip-hop's broad appeal wasn't apparent, but the record became an unexpected success in Britain, topping most year-end critics polls and earning the prestigious Mercury Music Prize; in America, it also became an underground hit, selling over 150,000 copies before the group toured the U.S. Following the success of Dummy, legions of imitators appeared over the next two years, but Portishead remained quiet as they worked on their second album. Named after the West Coast shipping town where Geoff Barrow grew up, Portishead formed in Bristol, England, in 1991. Prior to the group's formation, Barrow had worked as a tape operator at the Coach House studio, where he met Massive Attack. Through that group, he began working with Tricky, producing the rapper's track for the Sickle Cell charity album. Barrow also wrote songs for Neneh Cherry's Homebrew, though only "Somedays" appeared on the record. Around the time of Portishead's formation, he had begun to earn a reputation as a remix producer, working on tracks by Primal Scream, Paul Weller, Gabrielle, and Depeche Mode. Barrow met Beth Gibbons, who had been singing in pubs, in 1991 on a job scheme. Over the next few years, the pair began writing music, often with jazz guitarist Adrian Utley, who had previously played with both Big John Patton and the Jazz Messengers."

http://www.portishead.co.uk/

Puracane ==>

"Puracane began as a duo in 1999. Vocalist Ali Rogers and producer David Biegel co-wrote the album 'Things you should leave alone', released by Ubiquity records in 2000.
Ali Rogers decided to take the project from the studio to a live act and in 2000 Puracane played shows with Sting and Duran Duran and in 2001 with Jane's Addiction and Depeche Mode. Puracane's music featured in the films Driven Felicity, Road Rules and Real World.
Today Puracane are Ali Rogers on vocals, Juan Masotta on guitar and electronics, Drew Thurlow on bass, Andrew Griffiths on drums and Brett O'Mara on violin.
The band just released a new album: 'In Limbo', a collection of songs composed and produced by several satellite members during Puracane's hiatus.
Currently the band is working on new material for the next album and upcoming shows."

http://www.puracane.com/home.html

<== Shivaree

"In Moscow and Lisbon and Paris and Rome, Shivaree raised a genuine racket with their 1999 debut, I Oughtta Give You A Shot In The Head For Making Me Live In This Dump (Capitol). Even registered a bit of a tremor in the U.S. and Britain, thanks to a watchful press and a few dozen radio rogues. Mission accomplished, right? Romantic musical anarchists prevail against all odds: a waltz or three here, a black mambo there, and 19 months of second class travel to a cabaret near you secure a cult beachhead for our misfit crew. Soon, there’ll be waltz enough for all…
Rough Dreams , the band’s ’02 encore, may have been named for Otis Redding, but it played out more like prophecy than homage. Unremarkable but unremitting label squabbles devolved into a long playing nightmare that ended in wreckage. The album never saw a U.S. release, the band ceased touring, and if not for an odd weekly radio spot and the timely patronage of Quentin Tarantino and Hal Willner, Ambrosia Parsley and her band might have driven all the way off the map.
Ambrosia Sings the News debuted on Air America Radio the first Friday of April ’04 and quickly became one of the young network’s most popular segments, an ideal vehicle for Parsley’s devilish wit and indelible voice. Summer saw her accompany Uma Thurman’s victory lap at the close of Kill Bill 2, and deliver, with Cat Power and Blood Ulmer, one of the real spellbinders at Willner’s “Neil Young Project” in Brooklyn."

http://www.shivaree.com/

Soulstice == >

"Unquestionably alive, the music of Soulstice echoes of the past while remaining transfixed on the possibilities of tomorrow. Soulstice is futuristic electronic soul. Consisting of aural innovators Andy Caldwell and Gabriel Rene on keyboards, deck master Mei-Lwun Yee on turntables and songbird Gina Rene on vocals, Soulstice have released a string of sought after house and d&b classics including "Tenderly" and "Lovely." Featuring remix work by Kevin Yost, Johnny Fiasco and Acetate these 12"s have brought Soulstice into clubs worldwide on the playlists of notable artists such as Rainer Truby, DJ Garth, Mark Farina and Q Burns Abstract Message. Stateside, their debut album Illusion has garnered huge radio support from Jason Bentley and Kevin Lincoln, making Soulstice one of KCRWís most requested artists."
http://www.soulstice.com/

<== Thievery Corporation

"Thievery Corporation's fourth album, The Cosmic Game, finds the duo of Rob Garza and Eric Hilton in their most expansive mood yet, as their latest sonic exploration blurs the boundaries between rock, breaks, future-bossa, dub, and other mind-altering sounds. When dropped, The Cosmic Game is a psychotropic, aural concoction, which clearly opens a new dimension in the ever-evolving Thievery odyssey.
"When we finally got down to recording this album, we talked a lot about expressing more elements of our personal growth in our music. We also talked a lot about psychedelics and new ways of viewing reality and how they obviously affected music in eras past. During the months of recording, we spent a lot of time reading favorite authors and discussing 'so-called' conspiracy theories. I think this is fairly clear from the lyrics ," says Garza."

http://www.thieverycorporation.com/


Zero 7 ==>

"Zero 7 is a downtempo styled musical duo comprising of Henry Binns and Sam Hardaker from the United Kingdom. The band's songs feature vocals from Mozez, Sia Furler, Tina Dico, Sophie Barker, José González, and for the first time, Henry Binns providing backing vocals on the third album, The Garden."


http://www.zero7.co.uk/